Reconnecting

It's been a minute since I've written. Well, well over a minute. 

I started this blog in 2008, on the precipice of a book coming out and feeling like a fake since I didn't have a writing practice—I fell into being an author based good ideas and a driven work ethic but not a lot of substance or experience. And so I wrote. I wrote every day. At first I was angst ridden about content. I didn't remember feeling political back then but turns out I was. It gave me something to write about that wasn't writing about me. 

And then I began to write about me. As I glanced through my old posts the titles alone made me cringe - might be I never delve back in to read about who and where I was all those years ago. These days, I don't write. Maybe it's because I'm more grounded and don't need that outlet. Maybe it's because I've grown and don't need to be so introspective. Maybe posting on social media was quicker and easier than finding the words to fully express what I wanted to say. Maybe I just moved on. 

But maybe it's time to come back to a practice that was exploratory and healing, eye and heart opening. Since I started this blog my little-ish kids grew up and graduated from college. I've since rescued two dogs and lost one. I lost my mom and my brother - all three of those in the span of a year or so. I started a business. A podcast. I was a fierce activist until I burnt out and can't show up the way I used to. I organized like mad, directed videos, created events, started branching out to a fashion space that's unrecognizable from the all black all the time that defined me for much of my adult life. There's more on the horizon that I haven't been able to figure it out. Actually, my whole life has evolved without me figuring it out in advance. Things show up. At least I like to think that but it took and will take lots of hard work to get that to happen. 

So, change. Reluctantly ready for more. Perhaps writing it out or writing in general will be the energy I need to put into the universe right now to help figure out what's next. Stay tuned . . .

fashion: Wildfang jumpsuit, UGG fur sandals, buttons made by me, and too many necklaces