Saturday, December 11, 2010

Lock down

It's been a week. The kidney tests. The family drama. The winter chill outside. Scrambling to pull together a Hanukkah that didn't suck.

And then yesterday, on her birthday, someone I love dearly ended up in the hospital. All will be fine but it was more than I could handle.

And so I didn't.

I didn't process it think about it deal with it.

I made it through the day, and then had a night filled with nightmares of knitting projects I screwed up, of dinner parties I was hosting that I hadn't prepared dinner for, of my period not ending long after it should have.

Today I woke up, but not really. I dragged myself through a yoga class, came home and fell asleep. I think this is one day thay will be over without my ever really being fully in it.

Sleep seems to be my new coping strategy. And I'm ok with that for now.

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