Sunday, January 3, 2010

(not) getting back in the groove

I just lost my entire post. It was so hard to get back to writing after all this time away.

I wrote about the beauty of being in moments when I was away. Of kissing a dolphin in Mexico. Of skimming tree tops on a zipline in Honduras. Of being underneath a cascade of balloons, silver confetti, and streamers at the stroke of midnight on New Year's Eve. Of watching my mom bake the same cookies with Iz that my grandmother baked with me. Of sitting on the balcony as the sky turned purple and the full moon reflected brightly off the ocean, dimming the glittering stars.

Of being an anonymous version of me, not hyping, selling, telling, promoting. Just me on the beach, reading books, having frozen coffee drinks for breakfast, bringing freshly baked donuts upstairs for everyone while they slept. Loving the salad bar at lunch, playing telephone in the formal dining room at dinner.

Of being disconnected, not by choice, but learning to be fine with not constantly checking what else was going on in the world that wasn't my immediate present.

I wrote about not knowing how I'd gear back up. That I don't want to be on board. That I'm not sure how to get back into the groove. Or what groove I should be back in.

But, I lost it and don't have it in me today to recreate.

I'm back to a new 40 day blog sadhana, as I took a break while away.

Day one was a post of beauty that apparently wasn't meant to be.


Lisa Adams said...

I wondered if you were able to "unplug" or if your fingers were trying to type in your sleep. Glad you are home safely and that you had a wonderful trip.

quin browne said...

the joys and sorrows of electronic posting...

welcome home.