It's HERE!!!

I just got my very first, right-off-the-press, still-can-smell-the-ink-on-the-paper-copy of Flow.

Before I go any further, I have to restate that with the enthusiasm I felt: I GOT MY FIRST COPY OF FLOW!!!!!!! WOOHOO!!!!

Ok, back to the story . . . copies weren't due to the warehouse until October and I didn't give much thought to seeing it before. So when my editor called on Monday saying she had four advance copies on her desk and was sending one over, I was shocked. Shocked and nervous. After two plus years working on it (15 years since I first had the idea) and the mayhem and craziness that seemed inherent to the project, would I be happy? Could it possibly live up to what I was hoping/dreaming/wishing it would be?

My editor was so excited for me to see it she offered to bring her copy over, should the messenger not arrive. But, as we were heading out to a late afternoon yoga class (Jon had taken the day off work) a messenger was handing the package to my doorman. My heart started pounding and I couldn't quite open up the envelope. As we heading up Sixth Avenue, I slowly opened the flap, reached in, and felt a hard, solid, substantial book. As I pulled it out, the spot varnish (shiny bits) of the cover caught the afternoon sun and the calendar and Petty girl glistened. My heart ached. It was suddenly so real.

We started skimming through pages, knocking into people, hugging on the street, tears standing out in my eyes. It all came together into something sleek, smart, stunning, important. The art popped off the pages (and I scanned just about every piece). The story flowed (can't help that) from ad to ad, sidebar to callout, chapter opener to the heavily illustrated menstrual timeline.

Regardless of what happens next, my sense of pride and accomplishment is overwhelming. I've never worked so hard on a project or been so thrilled with the final outcome. Last night Jack (8) and I were talking about my writing career, about what happens when books aren't a huge success. He said, "Nothing is a failure. Everything is a success that you put out into the world." Exactly.